I Can't Love Her
by Kataomoi no Koibito
Summary: I can't love her... It's not possible... I love Mamo-chan!


AN: Changed my mind about the update dates for my stories, BUT I don't know when to start updating them so leave me suggestions as to when I should. Anyhow, I'm thinking about making this into a story. Let me know if you want to.

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I run faster and faster. My heart is pounding within my chest.

Rain is falling down on me, causing me to get completely soaked. But I just don't seem to care.

Why have I done that?

Why didn't I stop her?

Why do I continue to do this?

I love Mamo-chan. I shouldn't be doing this, but ...

I stop in front of my apartment building where I live with Mamo-chan, panting.

'But you love her even more' whispered a voice within my head

"No I don't! She's just a friend!" I screamed at myself, hitting myself on the head.

'But friends don't make love to friends with such passion if they were 'just friends'. When are you going to stop lying to yourself about Seiya. You love her' replied the voice knowingly.

"But that's impossible. Seiya's got her princess and I have Mamo-chan. Mamo-chan and I are destined to be together, " protested Usagi, walking up the stairs to her and Mamoru's apartment.

'Oh stop lying to yourself. Seiya LOVES you and you love her because surely you both would've stopped this love affair of yours by now and just moved on with your lives!' screamed the voice back with slight annoyance.

"But it's impossible because -," protested Usagi before she was cut off.

'Because of what? She's a woman? She's a Sailor Starlight? She's from another planet? She's promised to another? Oh please. You're dating Mamoru and yet she's still pursuing you, even when she knows that she'll never be able to have you.'

"But Seiya doesn't love. She can't love me. She loves Kakyuu-hime, " said Usagi with sadness, entering her apartment and closed the door behind her.

'But she does! She always loved you since the day she met you! Don't you remember how she told you that she wished that you could've met each other sooner? Didn't you even think about that whenever you two are too busy kissing each other whenever you're away from your friends and lovers? For crying out loud, think about how she looks at you. How she touches you. How she always does anything for you, even when she's having trouble with her own life!' yelled the voice as Usagi walked into her bedroom.

"But we're just friends. Of course she'll care about me. Seiya ... Seiya has ..., " Usagi trailed off mid-sentence, looking at the teddy bear keychain on her keys.

'Exactly. Now think about the time you guys spend together. Then you'll definitely know how much Seiya loves you, ' replied the voice encouragingly.

Usagi sighed, closing her eyes as she sat down on her bed. Thinking about how Seiya's eyes are always filled with love and passion whenever they looked at her. How Seiya is always gentle and patient with her even when they're making love. How Seiya's lips are always soft and warm against hers compared to Mamoru's. And how Seiya's caresses are always filled with love and warmth whenever they make love, causing her heart to always flutter.

Maybe she does love her, but it's not possible.

'Yes it is, so stop lying to yourself and go get her. She loves you too!' cried the voice.

"But it's impossible. I can't possibly love her. I just can't. I love Mamo-chan. I can't love Seiya, " screamed Usagi, tears welling up within her eyes as she started to tremble.

' YES YOU DO!'

"No I don't! I can't love Seiya! Just please stop it!" said Usagi, covering her ears as tears started to trickle down her face.

'You do love her and it's final, so give it up!'

"I don't. I can't. I really, really don't. I love Mamo-chan, " sobbed out Usagi, rocking back and forth.

'You do love Seiya. If you didn't, you wouldn't have given into her so easily. You always have loved Seiya since the day you guys met each other.'

"I can't love her. I don't. I'm getting married to Mamo-chan and we're going to have Chibiusa. We're destined to be with each other, " said Usagi to herself to drown out the voice's words.

'Destiny is exactly your problem. Now stop listening to everyone else and actually go for what you want for once.'

"I can't love her. I can't love her. I love Mamo-chan. I can't love Seiya. She doesn't even love me, " said Usagi over and over again, sobbing even harder until she fell asleep.


End file.
